nine months

we have a girl on the move. maybe that’s the theme of this month. movement.

she shall not be contained.

she is pulling herself up with no issues, and can almost stand on her own. she pushes around her little “car” and sometimes really gets some speed. walking seems sooo close.

because she is so mobile, picture-taking is all that more challenging.

take for instance, exhibit a:

or exhibit b:

yes, her animal print pants are out of control. she’s hazel and she knows it.


hazel is also becoming more “talkative”. unfortunately, these are not the words i dreamed of her saying first.

you would think we would say, “no-no-no-no” all day long. maybe we do? some have told me it’s just a sound she makes. she doesn’t know the difference.

i beg to differ.

she is already too smart for her own good.

she is also saying hi to everything. hi and a wave.

to everything.

she seems to always stop once we pull out the camera, but i caught her on our walk one day. she also is saying what sounds like. “doppy doppy doppy do”. it’s so funny. i was not successful in capturing it. so, you’ll have to just trust me on that one.

we are still trying new foods. she is a really good eater.

she had “fun” with raspberries:

and we even tried a “teething” biscuit.

i wish it were a magical teething biscuit where it made teeth appear.

no luck with that.

we tried a “smoothie” made of some fruits i found in the refrigerator. she is getting so good at drinking with a straw. however, she often forgets to swallow and it overflows in her mouth. now, we wait a second and pull away.

right before easter, i was shopping at this cute baby store and saw this cup with a straw. i thought about buying it for her easter basket. but for some reason i didn’t. so, when i went back a few weeks ago, i found out they were sold out and backordered because of their appearance on a tv show called “shark tank”.

{ lollacup on shark tank }

man, who knew i was a future trendsetter? crisis was averted when i found one on ebay, brand new in packaging, for retail price.

(it’s suuuuuuuuper cute, by the way.)

when we aren’t drinking out of straws, we are finding that even tables taste delicious.

there are still a few sleeping “challenges”. she still hates her crib.

i am hoping that being home this summer will help her find some sort of normal rhythms. having different sitters worked out so great this year, but i think the same “routine” with the same person may help the process of crib sleeping.

or i could be totally fooling myself.

there was some success with her sleeping in her go crib. well at least for a few hours. then, i had to climb down and sleep with her since there wasn’t enough room for us on the hotel bed.

we spent the weekend in santa rosa where jasen participated in a 100 mile bike ride through wine country.

i know. he’s crazy amazing.

we meet him for lunch at the park. he doesn’t even look tired.

jasen has spent thursdays (and recently mondays) with hazel while i was away at school. i took a few pictures (from his phone) of them having fun together on those days.

lastly, we had an amazing mother’s day. i say we because we celebrated as a family.

i woke up with a little something on my pillow.

it was perfect. it was something i never knew i always wanted.

we went to selland’s market-cafe for lunch. it was so yummy.

lastly, we went to my favorite place in sacramento, ginger elizabeth’s chocolates. jasen had preordered some cupcakes for us to pick up, and of course we couldn’t leave without a macaron (or 5).

i am learning to never take being a mom for granted. i am so blessed to have an amazing family. i know this is not the case for everyone. my heart breaks for the broken relationships and hardships that affect those on mother’s day. i send a special prayer to those who mourn the loss of broken bonds between families or bonds of familes who never had a chance to be. however, i do take time to thank god for giving me this opportunity to be a mother. i pray every day that i am a good one.


i do not know how to take photographs. 

well, like fancy people. 

99.4% of my pictures are taken with my iphone and slapped with a filter from instagram. i don’t claim to be a photographer or know how to take pictures. 

one day i read about an on-line photo editing site called it is this super great site where you can edit your photos without having to make an account. i haven’t really had a chance to play with it, but in a few spare moments i came up with these:



and fun with the “stamps” or whatever they are called:




The Diary of a Disgruntled Runner v8 (Final)

it has been like 3 weeks since we ran our half marathon.

i survived! yahoo!

were you concerned? did you think i feel of the levee? well, i am alive and well and have decided to give up running. more on that later.

the race snuck up on us very quickly. jasen and i became very “laid back” about the whole thing. training? nah.

we had plans to trade-off pushing the stroller throughout the race. then one day, jasen suggested we get a babysitter.

man, is he smart or what?

the night before, we went to our traditional dinner at hot italian. we sat outside and enjoyed our favorite pizza. and probably asked ourselves several times, “why are we doing this again”?

the morning of, hazel’s babysitter came bright and early and we made our way to the park. since parking is such a pain, we walked the 2 miles to the start. a pre-race warm up, if you will. we made a decision that we were going to just enjoy the race. take what comes. stop at the drink stations, and walk whenever we need to. having that pressure off our backs was amazing. knowing that we can finish whenever we want to, no matter what the time it is, was such a great feeling.

we lined up in the back and when the horn sounded we felt excited. before we knew it we had run 5 miles. just like that! i had some aches in my toes and was having a hard time trying to figure out what was wrong. later, we discovered my brand new shoes are too small. (thanks pregnancy!) when we reached half way, i remembered an “exercise” a friend told me about when she ran a marathon. before the race, she chooses 26 people to think about one for each mile. on mile 6, i choose my sister-in-law’s mom who is struggling with some health issues. it is amazing how your mind is lifted to somewhere else. it’s harder than you think it would be, but i am excited to try it again.

mile 6-9 were where i hit my stride. jasen and i made a deal that we didn’t have to wait for each other if the other was feeling strong. i realized if i ran really fast, i would get to the water stations quicker and then i could have a break. once i hit mile 10, the farthest in my training i hit a little wall. it was warmer than i would have liked, so i walked. and walked. and walked some more. i ended up finishing in the 2:27 time frame. definitely my slowest time. but, i wasn’t miserable. after a little rest, we walked the 2 miles back home, for a grand total of 17 miles.

this picture was towards the end of my training. i had a long day at work, and really didn’t feel like going for a run. especially pushing a stroller.

yes, especially that.

jasen said he would stay with Hazel and that i should go. and i am so glad i listened. i ran by this beautiful tree and couldn’t stop thinking about it. i ended up running back 0.25 mile and took a picture of it. i remember as i headed home, all of the wonderful moments i have had in running. and there were a lot. somehow, during this season of my life i have seemed to have forgotten. running has become more of a “have to” then a “want to”. who knows if i will ever be back to where i was. but, when i do run…i want to love it.

and right now, i don’t love it.

eight months

eight months. whew. what a whirlwind.

hazel has been so busy. like, bizzzzzz-ay.

i feel like a bad mommy. i do. i have had such a hard time documenting all of her “milestones”. they are just coming at me way too fast.

baby girl, slooooooow down. mama ain’t ready for this bizzznass.

let’s see…in one month she:

learned to clap,
say bababa,
wave bye-bye,
crawl on hands and knees,
pull up,
sit up from a crawling position,
stand alone for a few seconds at a time,
shake her head no. (i still believe she doesn’t really know what it means.)

finger’s crossed on that one. however, she does think it is hilarious when you shake your head at her. we’ve tried so hard not to use the word “no” but didn’t realize we were shaking our head so much.

well, i think that’s it.

here is her clapping:

and crawling:

she also sat in the swing for the first time. i think she liked it. with all the rain, we haven’t been back, but i know we will soon.

we have experimented with new foods as well. like mangos:

and blueberries with bananas:

she has also been practicing with the sippy cup:

and went in the “big” bath for the first time:

we have been blessed with a few hand-me-down toys, so she has had a great time exploring.

she likes to fall head first into the ottoman to get all up in the toy bizzznass.

it is very funny to watch. however, she has not figured how to get herself out yet.

we celebrated easter, and even a trip to see the easter bunny.

the bunny picture turned out terrible. and not in a good way.

we had ethan over (his mommy and daddy too) for an easter lunch.

he’s feeling right at home, can’t you tell?

of course, we had to do the bunny ears.

jasen and i even were able to get a night away to bodega bay. but, we spent most of our time at russian river brewing company in santa rosa. it’s lovely there.

and the ocean was nice, too.

month 9 is already here, and i am amazed to see all the things hazel will be up to. i can hardly believe she will be a year old in a few short months.

hopefully those month pictures will turn out a little better.

The Diary of a Disgruntled Runner v6 and v7

sorry i missed last week. i am still dealing with the trauma that was my long run.

i have always had an issue with the 11 mile run. i don’t know why. once, i was so hot, and didn’t bring water. another time, it was pouring rain and i was scared to death my phone would break, and this time, well this time will live on in infamy.

jasen is balancing his running with training for a century ride the weekend after our half marathon. i know, crazy. his training rides are on saturday mornings as well, so he often trades one for the other. that week was a bike ride, so hazel and i were on our own.

i should have seen it coming.

we started ok. slow going of course, but manageable. then somehow the tables turned.

crying baby.

that’s unusual. not only does hazel hardly cry…but the stroller usually knocks her out.

so, i stop…offer a snack and her water cup. we’re good.

2 minutes later, crying baby.

snack. water. good.

and the cycle repeated. by now, i was four miles from home. but what can i do at this point? hazel was making enough noise that people were starting to stare. and say, “ah, poor baby”. which of course i interpreted, “look at that terrible mother who is torturing her poor child”. so, i stopped, pulled her out of the seat and did the only thing i thought i could do, hold her and try to push the stroller back home. i was tired of all the stares, so i pushed the stroller up the levee, and tried to take a “short cut” through the surrounding neighborhood.

ha! short cut.

i realized there was no way that i could push the stroller and carry her all the way home. she became distracted with my headphones, so i placed her back in the stroller to only hear the screeching cries of a very pissed off baby. she eventually cried herself to sleep, or maybe i cried her to sleep, but who really knows at this point?

by now, i was too mentally, physically, and emotionally exhausted to run the rest of the way. so wee wee wee, we walked all the way home.

needless to say, i took off from running for the next 6 days.

i did another run (by myself) the next saturday of 10 miles. in like 90 degree weather at 8 am.

and now it is thursday, and the half marathon is saturday. the farthest i “ran” was 10 miles. we also decided to not push hazel in the stroller, but have he stay with ladonna (hazel’s monday sitter). it will probably be for the best, since she is a loose cannon at this point. i told jasen that i don’t think i will put the tag on my shoe. i don’t even care what our time is. we will just enjoy our time together, enjoy the run, and the exercise.

there’s always next time.


The Diary of a Disgruntled Runner v5

it was a pretty good week. it started off at Bodega Bay, with me running on the treadmill looking out to the water on our mini overnight vacation. i was supposed to run 4 miles, but i ended up running 2.5.

i was on vacation.

on wednesday, i pretended not to remember it was a run day, and see if jasen would notice. he did. and we ran.

i am glad someone is taking this seriously.

i ended up running my “long” run on friday. i pushed the stroller for 10 miles by myself. that’s something! i ran really well at first, then i fell apart at the end. so not my style.

i really need some new music.

long run: 10 miles.
total for the week:15.57 miles
pace: ha!

seven months :: curiouser and curiouser

seven months seems a lot like six months when it comes to development. however, hazel is growing, definitely eating more, and growing curiouser and curiouser. i imagine her with her blonde hair tied up in a black bow wearing a blue dress with a white apron.

{image found here.}

however, this may sum it up on most days:

{image found here.}

case and point.

curiouser and curiouser.

we started training for a half marathon. that’s fun.

by fun, i mean tortuous.

but see, it looks like hazel is having fun, no? i am not sure how the multi hour training will fare with the little. but, we’ll worry about that next month.

speaking of fun…there were several different times where H was able to have a few “play dates” this month. on Tuesdays with her cousin, ethan:

and a couple of times with my coworker’s twins:

we had a great time when grandpa came to town too!

but mostly, her days are spent eating. her favorite thing to do.

i think one of her favorite things right now has to be broccoli, kale and cheddar cheese puffs from happy baby. they smell super delicious. they taste super healthy.

she also tried some prunes for, let’s say, digestional issues.

but, in sad news, i made an adult decision to sell my beloved coffee table.

Hazel just didn’t have enough room to play and roll around. which she does.


it was a sad day for me. i loved that table. but, if i am honest with myself, it was all wrong for me.

it was all glass and i am all ocd. i spent half my life cleaning it. and jasen was not allowed to put his feet on it.

but, like a moth to a flame, i was drawn to it. and it to me.

but it is no longer.

wait…i didn’t kill it. it is off to another home. but, a piece of my heart will always belong to that table.

however, look at my baby Cleopatra:

so happy. with so much space.

i’ll let her tell you all about it:

too bad it didn’t last long.

now, she is off to bigger and better things like crawling and almost pulling herself up.

and playing in the fireplace.

curiouser and curiouser.